When I was pregnant with our son, I knew that we would always take him to Church with us on Sunday but I was nervous thinking of how he would behave as he got older. Thankfully, he is usually well behaved during Mass and has even started to follow along with praying, singing, doing the sign of peace, kneeling and even attempting to make the sign of the cross.
Despite the fact that he is so well behaved, I still get a bit anxious when he starts to act up. I understand that his occasional naughty behavior is completely normal given that he is a toddler. As most toddlers, he is full of enough energy to power a small aircraft for a trip to visit our family in Toronto and sometimes, it can be difficult to be quite and sit for any amount of time that isn't three seconds. (Sometimes it is difficult for me as well.) I have previously shared my Catholic Mass Survival Kit and I hope that it has helped. There are some additional tips that may also make going to Mass stress free: 1. Full Belly, Happy Children. Have you've heard the term 'hangry' before? (Hungry and angry, angry because of hunger.) We've all been there, right? Our son is wild, cranky and the definition of 'hangry' when he is hungry. That combination mixed with a quiet, long Mass can be torture. So, to prevent this hangry outburst from happening, we make sure that our toddler has eaten more than enough at breakfast before morning Mass. If we are going to Saturday night Mass, we make sure that dinner or at least a large snack happens beforehand. When I am brave enough to bring my son to Mass alone and I think that he hasn't eaten enough, I feed him extra. At the rate that he is growing, I have even let him eat a banana in the car right before going in. Of course, you can also bring in food like cereal, Larabars, banana, apple slices, or other mess free snacks with you to Mass. As he has gotten older, it has been easier for us to gradually stop bringing food and drinks in to Mass and just keep them in the car for after. 2. Make Mass Fun. My husband and I love going to Mass. I even get a leap of joy in my heart when we are driving to Church and I think of how I am going to soon be in the presence of Jesus Christ and get to receive Him through the Eucharist. Literally, it is like butterflies in my chest each time I remember what we are going there to do. It is important to make Mass a priority. More so, it is important for our son to see the joy we feel before going to Mass. If we were to show him that we don't really want to go to Church, then how will he ever want to? Sure, there are times when it is really, bone-chilling cold outside and I would much rather stay in my warm bed than do anything at all, but I don't let him see that. Instead, I will say something like, "we are so blessed to be able to worship God in a warm Church." This approach has worked for other situations like going to the doctor's office or the grocery store, except I definitely don't get bursts of joy when food shopping! “The earth could exist more easily without the sun than without the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass.” ~Saint Padre Pio of Pietrelcina
3. Monkey See Monkey Do.
To expand on the previous tip, it is important for us to model good behavior, especially at Mass. No phones, no loud talking, paying attention to the order of Mass, etc... While our son is not a monkey (even when he is literally climbing the furniture to get to his markers!) he does imitate almost everything that we do. He sees that daddy drinks espresso, he wants an espresso cup too (with milk, though), he sees that mama works on the computer, he wants to work on the computer. He sees that mommy and daddy genuflect (kneel) before getting into the pew and before the Altar, he genuflects now. (My heart EXPLODED the first time he did this!) Our little monkey, I mean son, has even genuflected when we've forgotten to. (Sorry, Jesus!!) It was an immediate reminder and we fixed our error. A reminder not just for going to Mass, but in all aspects of life: our children watch and imitate everything.
4. Sit Wherever You Want.
I love when I see other families with children at Mass. As Catholics, we want our faith to continue and thrive. One important way to do this is by bringing ourselves and our children to Mass. When you are there, sit wherever you want. The Church is God's house, He doesn't care where you sit as long as you are present. We sit in the same exact spot that we sat before having our son. Of course, if you feel more comfortable in the back, sit there. Just please don't feel pressured to sit in the back or in the crying room. The wonderful Priest that married my husband and me said that a Church filled with young children is a thriving Church. When I asked him about children making noise during Mass, he told us that he loves to hear children during Mass as it reminds him of what Jesus said: "Let the children come to me, and do not prevent them; for the Kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." (Mt. 19:13-15)
5. Grin and Bear It
Speaking of the wonderful Priest that married us, he gave us some advice when I was pregnant. He said to try to avoid taking our child to the back of the church, or outside, or anywhere else when he fussed. He said that children can actually train their parents and if we constantly removed him from the Mass each time he fussed, it would almost be like a reward. Our son would soon realize that 'all I have to do to get mommy or daddy up and moving is to make a scene.' Instead, our Priest suggested, we should try to calm, bounce, shush or feed (or all the above) right there in the pew. This has worked wonders for us and I highly suggest it to other parents. Of course, there are situations when children will not calm down and they have to be brought out as to not disrupt the Mass and so that they can settle down as well. What tips do you have for keeping children happy and calm at Mass? Please share any helpful tips or tricks with us on Facebook. As always, thank you for reading. God bless you and may the Blessed Virgin Mary be with you always!
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“Rachel’s Vineyard” ministry offers healing after abortion across the US and beyond. For more information, click here. For a list of Pregnancy Resource Centers in Rhode Island, please visit Rhode Island’s Right to Life website, here. Before you call me a hypocrite and start a petition to the Pope to excommunicate me from the Catholic Church (is that still possible?), hear me out. In my early twenties, when I was attending a more liberal university and had gone away from the Catholic faith, I used to side more with the “pro-choice” side than the pro-life side. My opinion on the matter used to be that while I would never have an abortion myself, I did not feel comfortable taking that “choice” away from other women. I thought that abortion should be legal for special circumstances, i.e. women who were raped, incest. etc... In fact, I even wrote a paper about my stance on the subject for a technical writing course. I really wish I had saved that paper so that I could reflect on it now. I was even a patient of Planned Parenthood, not for an abortion but for the annual exams. I commended PP as I received these exams free of charge when I lacked health insurance. I thought that being pro-choice meant women had control over their bodies. I thought that pro-choice meant women empowerment. I thought that was the priority. I didn’t know some things, though. I didn’t know that in 2009, the year that I graduated from college, 789,217 babies were aborted. I didn’t know that since Roe vs. Wade in 1973, 60,124,681 + babies have been aborted in the US alone. I didn't know that over ONE BILLION babies that have been aborted worldwide in the past century. I didn’t know that one in eight Planned Parenthood patients gets an abortion. I didn’t know that only 1% of abortions were performed on victims of rape. I didn’t know that women who have an abortion are at a high risk for mental health problems. I didn’t know that women who have abortions have a higher risk of subsequent health problems. I didn’t know that having an abortion can be more dangerous than giving birth. I didn’t know how horrific abortion procedures really are. (Click here to learn more.) I didn't know that a baby's heart begins to beat as early as 18 days from conception. I didn't know that that tiny heart will beat 65 times a minute before the first month.* I didn’t know that a baby can feel pain during the abortion, which is “long and agonizing.”* I didn’t know any of this. But, I do now. And now I can’t “unknow” these facts. For me, being pro-life means supporting women and babies. It means that there are always other choices instead of abortion. These choices are made possible by various resources available for women. Choice can equal life. Abortion does not equal women empowerment. This has not been an easy journal to write. As I have been writing this piece and researching the above facts, I have had to stop several times; especially when learning how abortions are performed, I have struggled and needed breaks. In these breaks, I’ve cried, almost thrown up, prayed, splashed water on my face, looked at baby photos of our son, prayed again and tried to keep the nausea at bay by grabbing a ginger candy I used to eat when I was pregnant with our son. I thought of the genetic counselor who calmly and unapologetically told us we had “options” when my son was said to have an elevated risk of Down syndrome when I was pregnant with him. I recall how I almost felt selfish at times for continuing the pregnancy. But then I remembered the unmeasurable joy each time we heard his heartbeat during the ultrasound. While the facts concerning abortion are brutal and “hard to know”, I wish I had known them sooner. I wish that I was “pro-life” sooner. I wish that when I was writing my paper in college for the technical writing class that I had researched the reasons why people (now, me included) are “pro-life” instead of just focusing on making my case. You see, pro-lifers are not here to “take women’s rights away.” We just don’t consider murder to be a right. A baby dies when an abortion is performed. Even if you think it is just a “clump of cells”, if left alone the clump of cells will become a baby. The baby will be born and the baby will be alive. Planned Parenthood When I was a patient at Planned Parenthood, my mother came with me a couple of times. Even though I majored in journalism and as a then-aspiring reporter, I should have been more aware of my surroundings, I wasn’t. I just sat in the waiting room, watching whatever was on the television as I waited to be called in for my annual exam. My mother, on the other hand, caught onto something. She saw young girl after young girl leaving and eating crackers. It took my mom only a few moments to understand that these girls had all just had an abortion. When she told me this, my heart shattered. I chose to never go back to Planned Parenthood after that appointment. My views on abortion started to change that day. Thank God and my mother that it did. Having our son was always our only choice But what if I were pro-choice when we were told that our son had an elevated risk of Down syndrome? The results were not presented in a positive, encouraging and uplifting manner. Instead, the genetic counselor said we had "options” (abortion). Who knows, maybe he wouldn’t be here today. Maybe my son would have been one of the 67% of babies aborted due to a Down syndrome screening. But instead, I yelled at her and said abortion would never be an option. We chose life. His life. It was God’s choice to give our son to us, whichever way He wanted to. Oh, and if you haven’t read my previous posts, our son does not have Down syndrome. Not that it matters to us. We would have loved and treasured him the same. What matters to us is that science was wrong and God was right. Thank you, God. There is so much more that I feel I could write about this subject, but said son is wrestling in his sleep and I know nap time is almost over. So while I used to be pro-choice. I am now, 100% unequivocally, irreversibly, completely PRO-LIFE! I pray that I will revisit this in the future with additional journals. To keep the discussion going, please visit us on Facebook. As always, thank you for reading. God bless you and may the Blessed Virgin Mary be with you always! Our Lady of Guadalupe, Protectress of the Unborn, pray for us! Sources:
“Facts & Figures.” Planned Parenthood, www.plannedparenthood.org/about-us/facts-figures. “Surgical Abortion Procedures: Types, Side Effects and Risks.” American Pregnancy Association, 26 Jan. 2017, americanpregnancy.org/unplanned-pregnancy/surgical-abortions/. “Reproductive Health.” Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 16 Nov. 2017, www.cdc.gov/reproductivehealth/data_stats/abortion.htm. “Stages Of Pregnancy & Fetal Development.” Cleveland Clinic, my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/7247-fetal-development-stages-of-growth. “Demographics.” Guttmacher Institute, 1 Jan. 2018, www.guttmacher.org/united-states/abortion/demographics. “U.S. Abortion Statistics.” Abort73, abort73.com/abortion_facts/us_abortion_statistics/. “Post-Abortion Syndrome.” Abort73, abort73.com/abortion/post_abortion_syndrome/. “Number of Abortions - Abortion Counters.” Number of Abortions in US & Worldwide - Number of Abortions since 1973, www.numberofabortions.com/. “AbortionFacts.com.” Fact #13: The 8 Week+ Unborn Baby Feels Real Physical Pain during an Abortion., www.abortionfacts.com/facts/13. Brown, Allison. “Abortion-The Facts.” Catholic365, www.catholic365.com/article/3391/abortionthe-facts.html. Yeh, Becky. “New Video Debunks Planned Parenthood's 3% Abortion Myth.” Live Action News, 4 Jan. 2017, www.liveaction.org/news/new-video-debunks-planned-parenthoods-3-percent-abortion-myth/. “Abortion and Down Syndrome.” Healthline, www.healthline.com/health-news/the-debate-over-terminating-down-syndrome-pregnancies#1.
“Have no anxiety about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will keep your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7
I must admit, sometimes just reading that passage above can bring on some anxiety for me. Have no anxiety. But what if I do have anxiety? What if it will never go away? Let your requests be known to God. But what if He doesn’t hear me? What if He doesn’t want to listen? What if I can’t turn everything over to God? How do I give up control to God entirely? Since I was a little girl, I have dealt with anxiety and my anxiety was at its peak when my son was born. Thankfully, I have been able to rely on several “tools” to help minimize my anxiety. Prayer The first line of defense in my anxiety is prayer. I pray all day, every day. From before sun up, to after sun down. I am also constantly praying the Holy Rosary. It is quite difficult for me in this stage of momlife to a toddler for me to pray the Rosary in one sitting, so I rely on praying “chunks” of it throughout the day. If I finish a Rosary before the day is up, I just start on the next day’s. For me, praying throughout the day helps me feel more in control of my life and assures me that I am never alone in my anxieties or difficulties. I always turn to Jesus and through Our Lady for help. Therapy I started going to a therapist a few months before my son turned one year old. While I wish that I had gone sooner to help ease my postpartum anxiety and subsequent lingering anxiety, I still go to this day, albeit it less often. Talking to someone outside of my sphere of family, friends and coworkers about “stuff” helps tremendously. My second form of “therapy” that requires no health insurance nor copay is the Sacrament of Reconciliation. The moment that I pour out my sins, ask for forgiveness, receive absolution and make my penance, I feel amazing. There are no words for the relief that overcomes me when I know that I have aired out all the sins weighing me down.
Exercise
Not only is exercise good for the body, but it is good for the mind. When I first started going to therapy, I was adamant about not taking medication for my anxiety. (Please know that I do not think there is anything wrong with taking medication and I do not look down on anyone that does, I just didn’t want to.) I was fearful of side effects and wanted to try to battle the beast of anxiety on my own. My therapist advised me that if I were truly insistent on not taking medication, I would have to exercise. Apparently, exercise can positively change certain chemicals in the body and can lessen anxiety and/or depression. As a self-imposed guinea pig, I can attest to this research that exercise helps with anxiety. You just have to make sure you exercise often and enough. Since I am a work-from-home mother to a toddler who is “go-go-go” (his words, not mine) from when he wakes up to when he sleeps, I wake up earlier to exercise. Waking up earlier also allows me time to pray…quietly. Supplements Another suggestion that my therapist had was to consider supplements for anxiety. A friend suggested taking Ashwagandha root. After checking with my primary doctor, I decided to give it a try. The results were not immediate, but after almost a year of taking Ashwagandha, I have seen a considerable difference. Ashwagandha root can be used to reduce stress, anxiety, inflammation and cortisol levels and can also help improve sleep. After extensive reading, I also began taking a daily probiotic to help increase the good bacteria in my gut. Hippocrates claimed that "all disease begins in the gut" and I read here that the “brain and the gastrointestinal [gut] system are intimately connected.” Another supplement that I recently included in my daily regime is Vitamin D3, as my blood work showed that my current level just barely made the recommended level. Vitamin D3 has also been indirectly associated with mood disorders. For me, so far so good.
Calling For Backup
There are certain instances, however, when my anxiety does forcefully strike and I need some backup to push it back at bay. One instance where I need backup for my anxiety is sickness. Sickness is a trigger for my anxiety. Sickness hit our house just last week in the form of the dreaded stomach flu. My son was sick on Sunday evening and then my husband and mother both began to get sick on Monday evening. Since everyone in my house had the stomach bug, I immediately felt anxiety come running like an Olympian sprinter. Not only was I fearful that I would get sick and not be able to take care of them, but I was also anxious that they were sick to begin with. Between the hours of 1:00 AM and 5:00 AM, I kept alternating between taking care of my husband in one bathroom, my mother in the other bathroom and praying that my son would not wake up nor get sick. Each time I would lay back down to try and sleep, I would hear someone needing help. Why does the stomach bug almost always start in the middle of the night? I figured that at least I could care for them and not have my son in the crossfire. While I usually prayerfully run to the Blessed Mother and fling myself onto her for her intercession, this time, for some reason, I started to pray to Saint Monica. In my frenzy of caring for my husband and mother, I just went with it and asked for her intercession. My prayer sounded like this “St. Monica, I know you don’t know me or my family yet, but I was hoping that you could please intercede for my family. My mother and husband are very sick and I pray that they recover and I am able to not get sick and continue having enough strength to take care of them and also that my son does not get sick either. Thank you. Through Jesus Christ, Our Lord, Amen.” Now I think that maybe the Blessed Mother (who knows I am needy) sent Saint Monica to me and was tending to my mother and husband instead. Maybe so, maybe not, but it is comforting to think of. Praise God (and thank you Our Lady and St. Monica!) that I did not get sick, I was also able to take care of my husband and mother and my son did not get sick again. Within a few (long) days, everyone was starting to get back to normal. Of course, that is when I got sick, again. Thankfully, my sickness was not the stomach flu and instead just a nasty head cold. Unfortunately for me, this was the third head cold that I had gotten since Thanksgiving. Since sickness often brings on anxiety for me, I needed backup. What are my go-to backup tools for anxiety? A full glass of water (dehydration can induce feelings of anxiety), a few drops of lavender oil, mind-numbingly horrible reality television (thou shalt not judge me), chamomile tea and of course, prayer. Usually, I work like a madwoman during my son’s naptime, but for one day, I succumbed to the fact that I needed backup for my anxiety and spent the time smelling the lavender oil, watching stupid reality TV and praying during the commercials while sipping chamomile tea. I also fell asleep for a half hour and awoke to the sound of my son screeching “MAMA! MAMA! MAMA!” on the monitor. At least we were on the mend. Thank you again, Saint Monica. It was nice to meet you, although I wish it were under better circumstances and I appreciate any help you gave. Do you have anxiety triggers? What are your go-to anxiety remedies? Please share on Facebook! As always, thank you for reading. God bless you and may the Blessed Virgin Mary be with you always (and St. Monica, too)!
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Happy Birthday to our sweet, precious boy!
I can’t believe that our son is TWO years old! It really does feel like it was just yesterday that I was taking several at-home pregnancy tests and willing a positive result. As in all things, God had a greater gift for me. While the tests all showed negative, I just knew that I was pregnant. In my impatience, I took test after test and still nothing. Then on Mother’s Day, 2015, I woke up bright and early, swearing it would be the last test I would take. The minutes went by painfully slow. But this time, I received my first and best Mother’s Day gift: I was PREGNANT! We were elated! I couldn’t contain the excitement and felt overjoyed that there was LIFE growing inside me. From the moment he was conceived, our son has been our biggest blessing, despite the obstacles. As I’ve written, my faith was tested but continuously strengthened from the day we learned there was a high “risk” of Down syndrome (Trisomy 21) to when our sweet boy was born and we were told that his screening was a “false positive.”
While we would have loved our precious boy just the same, an extra chromosome or not, I just always had a feeling that he didn’t have Down syndrome. At the time, people could say that I was “in denial” or “delusional”, given the test had a “97%” accuracy for his 9 in 10 risk”, but my mother’s intuition turned out to be right.
However, I now realize that if I hadn’t been so impatient to learn the gender of our baby and did not take the test to screen for Down syndrome (it checks for gender as well as chromosomal abnormalities), then I may not have been able to deepen my relationship with Jesus Christ and the Blessed Mother. Again, God used my impatience to forever change my life. During the last trimester of my pregnancy while we were celebrating the birth of the Lord, I spent more time than a pregnant woman usually would at my doctor’s office and the Prenatal Diagnosis Center at Women and Infants Hospital. Our son was diagnosed with IUGR at the end of my second trimester and therefore required twice weekly screenings that a few times left me afraid that we would go to the hospital sooner than my delivery date. During this time, I would pray the Rosary and call out to specific saints (St. Anthony and St. Anne especially) to intercede on my son’s behalf. These tests went up until the very end of my pregnancy. In fact, due to his limited growth, I was scheduled to be induced early. But as in all things related to our son, God had a better plan. My water broke two days before I was schedule to be induced. Special note: my water broke just as I laid down to relax after a very long day, a taste of months to come with a newborn. Our son’s due date was supposedly around the same time as the Epiphany of our Lord. I say supposedly because from the start, I had a feeling it was closer to the end of December. My mother’s intuition was right again as our son was born 18 hours after my water broke and on the Feast of the Holy Family! Quite fitting for us, given the fact that we relied heavily on the Blessed Mother, Saint Joseph and, of course, Jesus Christ during the pregnancy. God not only listened to and answered our prayers for a healthy baby, regardless of Down syndrome, but he gave us our biggest gift on this great feast day. God knows what He is doing! The time I was in the hospital during and after giving birth, a week after the Nativity of Our Lord, I couldn’t help but think of the Blessed Mother and how she brought Jesus into the world. Whereas with my son’s birth, I was warm, albeit in significant pain, in a hospital, surrounded by my husband, my mother, my doctor and nurses. She was alone with Saint Joseph, most likely without very much shelter, surrounded by animals and without a proper bed to place Jesus in when he was born. It almost makes the 15 hours of unmedicated labor not as bad (I opted for the epidural towards the end!) Okay, almost not as bad!
Now that our son is TWO years old, I am so thankful to be able to realize all these lessons. I am still learning to be patient, let go and LET GOD.
I remember getting ready to go home from the hospital with him and asking my husband “I can’t believe they’re going to let us leave here with him!” Still, two years later, it is sometimes difficult to think that God has entrusted us with a child. But when it comes to raising children, we can do our best as parents, but we must realize that God is the ultimate parent. In trusting in Him, He will guide our paths and make our lives better in all ways.
If I haven’t said this enough, God, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR OUR SON!
Our sweet boy: the love that we have for you is overwhelming and we are not able to put into words just how much you have better and changed our lives! Thank you for being ours. God bless you all the days of your life! Numbers 6:24-26 Prayer to the Holy Family: Lord Jesus Christ, who, being made subject to Mary and Joseph, didst consecrate domestic life by Thine ineffable virtues; grant that we, with the assistance of both, may be taught by the example of Thy holy Family and may attain to its everlasting fellowship. Who livest and reignest, world without end. Amen. Please join me in wishing our sweet, precious, wild boy a very Happy 2nd birthday on Facebook! As always, thank you for reading. God bless you and may the Blessed Virgin Mary be with you always!
“The days are long but the years are short.”
I have heard this phrase a thousand times and have repeated it to myself on the hard days. But, boy, does it sometimes smack you in the face! Like today, when my son wasn’t attempting to injure himself in any way possible, he wanted me to carry him. EVERYWHERE. This wasn’t a problem when he was younger, but now that he’s 30 pounds and much more solid, it can take its toll. Especially when I am trying to get some chores and work done. This morning, as I was picking him up for what seemed like the 100th time and lamenting the fact that my back was starting to get a burning ache, with the hand that wasn’t holding him on my hip, I tossed some mail into the shred pile. Then I stopped. There was a postcard from my university (Go Rhody!) that is sent frequently to alumni. At first, I thought how great it would be if he went to the same university that I did and then I thought, oh my goodness, one day my sweet little boy will (hopefully) be going to a university. He won’t be the 30-pound squirmy worm that just wants his mama to hold and carry him around everywhere. He won’t be the little boy who calls himself “Jo Jo” and demands to me “I do” when I try to brush his teeth or hair. He will, God-willing, grow into a strong, wonderful man. One day he won’t only be ours anymore. He will belong to friends, a wife, children, co-workers….the world. For now, it is just us. Our little, sometimes quiet, mostly loud, family.
As we are now approaching his second birthday, the reality of “the days are long but the years are short” are screaming at me louder than when I don’t give him “bobby” (peanut butter) sandwiches for lunch.
So, instead of getting upset that the dishes needed to be done, the clothes needed to be folded and my pile of work was overflowing, I strapped on the baby carrier, propped him inside and spent the morning making chocolate hazelnut date balls for desert. I first made these chocolate hazelnut date balls when I was pregnant with him. When I was pregnant, I read somewhere that eating dates in the third trimester can help when it comes time to labor. So, every single day, I would eat dates, multiple times. I would put them in shakes, cut them up and put them on bagels, roll them into the same chocolate hazelnut date balls. So today, as I was putting the dates in the food processor, I was struck with another “the years are short” realization. As I carried him my womb two years ago and we shared chocolate hazelnut date balls, now, as he is almost two years old, I again carried him but this time in my arms and again, we shared chocolate hazelnut date balls. These past two years have flown by and it is bittersweet to watch him grow up. Whether it is making chocolate hazelnut date balls or praying the Rosary together, I thank God for the constant, little reminders to slow down and enjoy each precious, little moment. How do you slow down to enjoy the precious, little moments? Please share with us on Facebook! As always, thank you for reading. God bless you and may the Blessed Virgin Mary be with you always! Christmas is such a marvelous season in which after preparing ourselves throughout the four weeks of Advent, we joyfully celebrate Our Lord Jesus Christ’s Nativity. With beautifully decorated homes, Churches and businesses along with Christmas music, gifts, parties and feasts, the season of Christmas can become so ornate that it can be easy to overlook just how humble His birth really was.
The manner and place in which the Blessed Virgin Mary gave birth to Our Lord and Savior is quite the opposite of the elaborate festivities that take place around the globe to celebrate His birth. While I do feel that it is justified to jubilantly celebrate His birthday as it is one of the greatest events to occur in history, one must not forget how God came to us. “and she gave birth to her firstborn son. She wrapped him in swaddling clothes and laid him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.” (Luke 2:7) Let the sentence “there was no room for them in the inn” sink in for a moment. On Christmas Day, I was reading all the Gospels for the various masses and when I finished reading that sentence sobs immediately lumped in my throat and tears welled up in my eyes. Thankfully it was my son’s nap-time, so I was forced to quickly swallow my sobs and wipe my tears. God loves us so much that He choose His Son to be born to us in the poorest and most simple of ways. He came to us, a King in the exact opposite of how a King would be born, as perceived by secular world. My sobs and tears came so quickly after reading that sentence because I remembered the times when I didn’t have room for Him. I remembered how empty and meaningless my life was when I made no room for him. To this day, there are still moments where I could do a better job of making even more room for Him. Just as there was “no room” for Him then, too many still do not have room for Him now. Thanks to Saint Francis of Assisi, who created the first nativity scene in 1223, the Nativities are a simple, yet powerful reminder of Jesus Christ’s humble beginning. For our family, the Nativities in our home are always put up first and taken down last. But, if you had never heard of Jesus Christ and did not know that He was the Son of God and you saw the Nativity Scene, would you imagine that God would be born and become flesh there? In an area which was used to accommodate farm animals? With the Nativity Scene, Saint Francis of Assisi wanted “to do something that will recall the memory of that Child who was born in Bethlehem, to see with bodily eyes the inconveniences of his infancy, how he lay in the manger, and how the ox and ass stood by.” It reminds us that we need to always make room for Jesus Christ in the “inns” of our hearts, minds and souls. Wouldn’t You Have Opened the Door to the Blessed Mother Pregnant with Jesus and St. Joseph? You still can. The true celebration of the Nativity of Jesus comes when we actually follow Jesus’s ways in our actions and in our words. When we make time for daily prayer, weekly Mass (at least), and regular confession. When we take the time to venture out into our community to see how we can utilize our time, treasures and talents to help those in need. When we love one another, and treat everyone like they were the baby Jesus laying in swaddling clothes in the manger. How will you make room for Jesus Christ? Please share with us on Facebook! As always, thank you for reading. God bless you and may the Blessed Virgin Mary be with you always! Merry Christmas! Source: “Understanding the Nativity Scene.” Archdiocese of St. Louis - Alive in Christ, archstl.org/stewardship/page/understanding-nativity-scene. "It's beginning to look a lot like CHRISTMAS!" is something that I have (annoyingly) been singing during each day in this last week of Advent. The menus for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day are finalized, food shopping is officially done, the Little Christmas Angel has been flying about the house, baby Jesus(s) have been wrapped and the box is under the tree, we know which Masses we are going to, Christmas cards have been sent, the tree is completely decorated and the stockings are all hung by the chimney with care. Okay, well, the stockings are just hanging on for dear life at this point, but still, Christmas is almost here! Every item off our “Christmas To-Do List” has almost been checked off. Ut-oh. Christmas gift shopping. Before having our son, I had this Christmas gift shopping down pat. As a self proclaimed "Type A person" I would plan, buy, wrap, ribbon and be ready to put the gifts under the tree before the first Advent candle was even lit. Now, things are much different, and I've been struggling to make sure that a gift is accounted for everyone. Most of our family and friends have agreed to forgo exchanging tangible gifts and to instead spend quality time together. Despite the fact that our gift lift was quite small this year, it has still been difficult to finish Christmas shopping. Here are three ideas for last minute Christmas gifts:
1. Give Us This Day: Daily Prayer For Today's Catholic. “Give Us This Day is a monthly publication centered on the Word of God. Drawing inspiration from a multitude of voices, it provides a relevant and trustworthy understanding of Scripture.” I was given a subscription to this monthly publication and it is one of the best gifts that I have ever received. Not only does the book come to me directly each month, but it is something that I can both start my day with and end my day with. The monthly books include profiles of holy people, readings and prayers for Mass, reflection on Scripture, morning and evening prayer, weekly insights and more. 2. Have a Mass celebrated for someone. Having a Mass celebrated for someone can be done whether the person is Catholic or not. Contact a Catholic Church and request that a Mass is celebrated for your family member. Or, you could also have a Mass celebrated for that person’s deceased family member or for another special intention. It is customary to make a monetary donation to the Church when requesting to have a Mass celebrated. Bonus points if you and that person attend the Mass together! 3. Donate in lieu of a gift. This is one of my favorite ways to give someone a gift. Donations in lieu of a gift can be made for Christmas, Easter, birthdays, anniversaries or really, any time. Giving a gift of charity lasts much longer than the holiday or celebration. Make sure that the charity you are donating to is a nonprofit registered by the Internal Revenue Service and that your donation is truly tax-deductible. While you could contact the charity and ask them directly, websites like Charity Navigator allow you to research charities to see how they rank, if there are any testimonials about their work and you may even be able to see tax forms if they’ve been uploaded. These tax forms will show you how much of the donations are spent on the actual cause and how much is spent on other expenses like salary, general operating costs, etc… The best part about websites like Charity Navigator is that they are free and easy to use. You may be surprised at what you find out about your favorite charity or you may be pleased with the findings. If none of the gifts mentioned above tickle your fancy (where did that saying come from?!) you could always head over to your grocery or drugstore and pick up gift cards. I think most of us will agree that gift cards are wonderful and can easily fit into a Christmas card, hence no wrapping! Win win! As we finish these last days of Advent, I am reminding myself to not stress about the little things like last minute gifts. Wont you join me in trying to remain as stress free as possible and to think of the real Gift of Christmas? "...the hour and moment in which the Son of God was born Of the most pure Virgin Mary, at midnight, in Bethlehem, in the piercing cold." I have been mediating on St. Andrew's Novena. For me, thinking especially of that most sacred image in that precious moment in time has allowed Christ's coming to the world to ease any burdens and keep me focused on the true meaning of Christmas. So, whether you purchase a subscription to ‘Give us This Day’ or are grabbing several gift cards for family and friends, I hope you have a very Merry almost Christmas! What are some of your favorite gifts to receive or give? Please share with us on Facebook. As always, thank you for reading. God bless you and may the Blessed Virgin Mary be with you always! Since the Fourth Sunday of Advent also happens to be Christmas Eve and Christmas falls on Christmas Day, Catholics must attend Mass twice in order to fulfill both the Sunday mass requirement and the Christmas Mass requirement. "When consecutive obligations occur on Saturday-Sunday or Sunday-Monday, the faithful must attend Mass twice to fulfill two separate obligations," the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops' Committee on Divine Worship said earlier this year. Every other year my family and I would celebrate Christmas Mass on the Christmas Eve Vigil. Before having our son, we would attend the midnight Mass. These days, I would need two naps and three shots of espresso to stay awake until midnight. My family would gather at our house and we would host a big, somewhat traditional, Italian Christmas Eve dinner and then we would all attend Mass together. When I say "somewhat traditional" I am referring to the Italian, and Neapolitan, "Feast of the Seven Fishes" which is celebrated on Christmas Eve. While growing up, my nonna would cook for days leading up to Christmas Eve. For our family, there were many more than just 7 fish dishes. I can even remember a platter of an entire cooked octopus on the dining room table surrounded by a multitude of other dishes she would make. While I aspire to be as wonderful of a cook as my grandmother, my family barely eats fish now, not evening mentioning an octopus. So instead I make some seafood, like baked stuffed fish, linguine with clam sauce and shrimp cocktail. I tried frying calamari one year but haven't been brave enough to revisit that undertaking again. Oil + high temperatures + toddler = disaster. While the menu is the same as previous years, Mass this year is different as I mentioned Christmas Eve falls on a Sunday. When I first realized this I wondered how we were going to make it work. Luckily, Under Thy Roof put together a great graphic which helps decide which two masses to attend: The takeaway: attend TWO Masses this weekend, using whichever combination explained above.
When I say we "have" to attend two masses, I mean it in a general context, not that it is a burden. As, Jesus Christ is the real reason for the season, I think it is actually quite nice to be spending some extra time with Him on His birthday. How will you be celebrating Christmas Eve and Christmas Day? Will there be octopus involved? Please share with us on Facebook. As always, thank you for reading. God bless you and may the Blessed Virgin Mary be with you always!
Since I was a little girl, my mom and I had always waited for Christmas Eve to put baby Jesus in the manger. The empty cradle was symbolic of our waiting for Jesus Christ to arrive at Christmas and I would always get so excited to give him a kiss at midnight (or before bed) on Christmas Eve and then each day until the Epiphany on January 6th.
Since my son was about two years old, however, we've tried something different. We keep Jesus out of the mangers and wait until a few weeks of Advent pass. Then around the third or fourth week of Advent, my son and I collect each baby Jesus and nestled them in a small shoe-box filled with tissue paper. The first year, my son was so excited to collect all the “babies” and proud that he got to put them in the box. Before placing them in the box, my little love gives each baby Jesus figurine a kiss. We then close the box and I wrap it in Christmas wrapping paper. Then, he proudly puts the box under the tree. The first year, not a minute passed that the box was under the tree and my son started demanding “Open! Open! Open! Baby! Baby! Baby!” I reminded him that baby Jesus is coming soon and we will open it before bed on Christmas Eve. He settled down once I promised him that he will get to unwrap the box and put Jesus back in each of the mangers.
The Best Present of All
When we put Jesus in the box and I told him that Jesus will be here soon, it will hopefully make a bigger impact on him come Christmas Eve. The box of baby Jesus figurines will also be the first present that he gets to open. This is quite symbolic to the fact that despite all the hours we spend shopping, wrapping and exchanging gifts, Jesus Christ is the best gift that we will ever receive. “Because of his boundless love, Jesus became what we are that he might make us to be.” – Saint Irenaeus of Lyons I hope to continue with the tradition with my little loves of placing baby Jesus in the box, wrapping it and putting this greatest gift under the tree. I pray that my son will always nestle Jesus in his heart and soul and carry Him there for all their lives; realizing that Jesus Christ’s birth is our greatest gift. Do you have any special traditions with baby Jesus that you share with your family? Please share with us on Facebook. As always, thank you for reading. God bless you and may the Blessed Virgin Mary be with you always! Counting when I was pregnant with our little love, this will be the third Christmas that I have been a mother. As a mother, I look at baby Jesus in the manger, nestled in between the most pure Virgin Mary and Saint Joseph and feel overwhelmingly happy to belong to Him. I think of my son and how much joy and how many blessings he has brought to our family since he was born. As a mother, I also think of how our Blessed Mother would feel during this season leading up to the celebration of our Savior’s coming into the world. I think of how she, the Mother of us all, would feel about her children at what is known as ‘the most wonderful time of the year.’ Here is what I think she would tell me and all of us. When you are shopping for gifts for family members or friends, think of my Son. When you see a man dressed as Santa Claus posing for photos with children, think of my Son. When someone wishes you ‘Happy Holidays’, think of my Son. When someone wishes you “Merry Christmas’, think of my Son. When someone ignores your “Merry Christmas” greeting, think of my Son. When you drive past an elaborately decorated house, illuminated with endless lights, think of my Son. When you sip a cup of steaming hot cocoa either alone or snuggled up with loved ones, think of my Son. When you listen to Christmas music, even if it is about a snowman or a reindeer, think of my Son. When you are vying for the last parking spot at the mall and someone steals your spot, think of my Son. When you are up late at night wrapping endless gifts, think of my Son. When you are shopping for groceries to prepare a Christmas feast, think of my Son. When you are baking cookies and getting them ready to give to loved ones, think of my Son. When you feel the burden of Christmas parties, decorations and other obligations, think of my Son. When you are tired, stressed, worried, anxious or otherwise burdened, think of my Son. When you feel worried that you won’t be good enough this Christmas, think of my Son. When you are sad because the Christmas season is missing a loved one, think of my Son. When you are sad for whatever reason and not feeling the ‘Christmas spirit’, think of my Son. When you drive past my Son’s home, consider going inside the Church to be with my Son. During this entire Advent season leading up to the birth of my Son at Christmas, think of Him. Think of my Son coming into this world, which is the same world in which you live. Think of my Son at that hour and moment ‘at midnight, in Bethlehem, in the piercing cold.’ Think of my Son at that very moment in which the entire world stood still when he was born. Think of why my Son was born: for our salvation, for your salvation. I am promising to take moments this Advent, even when I am not in prayer, at Mass or saying the Rosary, to think of Jesus. Whether I am happily wrapping presents or trying to keep cool when someone steals my spot in a busy parking lot. I hope you will too. Please share with us on Facebook. As always, thank you for reading. God bless you and may the Blessed Virgin Mary be with you always! |
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